How to Grow Confidence
What are you telling yourself every time you’re going to do something (ex. be active for 20 mins a day), but don’t? What about when you put someone’s wants above yours at the expense of your well being?
It doesn’t matter how you slice it, you are sending out a loud and very clear message that you don’t matter and that your word can not be trusted. Now that is a blow to your confidence. Do it enough times and you may start to believe it.
On top of all that living with chronic illness has a way of sneaking in plentyyyy of moments that leave you doubting your worth, your body and/or your ability.
This all results in diminished self trust, confidence and worth, which is NOT a place that sets you up to be confident with an illness.
Let’s fix that now.
Keep small promises to yourself
These promises do NOT need to be big, in fact it’s better if they are little and easy because you are more likely to accomplish them. Pick one and do it consistently. Once you feel like you have a handle on that, add another and so on.
Here are some examples of the promises I am talking about -
Drink 8oz water first thing in the morning.
Pack your food for the day the night before to avoid rushing around in the morning.
Get up from your desk twice a day and take a 5 minute walk.
No phones or blue light 20 minutes before bed.
Making promises to yourself shows you that you do give a fuck about your wellbeing. It also reinforces the idea that your word means something.
The more you do stick to your promises, the more trust you have in yourself and your ability to continue to prioritize your needs.
This leads to more confidence and an increased sense of control over your wellbeing. Which is a big deal because chronic illness often takes away the feeling of control over our body, mind + health, but not anymore!
Not to mention trusting yourself and more confidence is hella empowering too.
Consciously be proud of yourself throughout the day
You can choose to fixate on what is missing or what you can’t do OR you can chose to celebrate the shit out of yourself. My advice would be to chose the latter.
Look, life is a lot. It’s a beautiful mess and if you don’t stop and appreciate yourself you will get lost along the way.
No one is going to be as good of a cheerleader as you are to yourself. After all, you know exactly what you need to hear in that moment.
Next time you are doing a task, try congratulating yourself once you finish it (or make progress).
For example, the other day I was unloading groceries, but I was dreading it because I was tired after shopping. After I brought everything inside I took a moment to appreciate my efforts - out loud I said ‘Fuck yeah, you bad bitch. You didn’t want to do it, but you did. Good job.’
Then I literally stopped and (quickly) soaked in that feeling of pride and accomplishment. Note: the last part is key - it takes you out of your head and in to the current moment so you can really appreciate *and feel* what you did.
This may sound silly but is hyping yourself up really silly?
No, it’s not.
Especially when this confidence booster will make you feel literally unstoppable and proud of all the things you do.
And, bonus! It makes space for a shift in mindset overall, one that is seeing more good in yourself and your life vs paying attention to the various pitfalls throughout the day.
Now I know I have talked about these things before, but part of thriving with illness is trusting your word and being confident in yourself, so they needed to be mentioned again.
These tips are simple, but not easy. Don’t get discouraged, it’s a process. As usual, start small and go from there.
You got this!
